Target Arrow

It's a wrap for 2015! Even though it's only April.. =)

Happy 26th birthday dear AF.. Thanks sebab bagi saya one of the sweetest moment ever on your big day.. Thank you dear Allah sebab da buka hati dia untuk saya.. Thank you juga sebab da buka hati saya sedikit sebanyak untuk jadi yang lebih baik dari semalam.. Alhamdulillah..

Things change, focus change..

Bagai seorang pemanah, tanpa arah & tujuan maka jatuhlah anak panah tanpa terkena sasaran.. For all these years I have been targetting to the same target & this time I will change my target.. To a better target spot! InsyaAllah, ahamdulillah for everything..

Xde satu pun yg dijadikan dengan sia2 olehNya..

#5

I'm loud..

I was born big..
Big voice I mean.. hihi..

Pasal tuh la org salu misunderstand me..
My 'ye ke?' or 'mana?' tuh org akan anggap saya macam nak argue.. padahal saya betul2 nak tahu apakah..
Then kalau saya bergossip dengan my gff, for sure org depan belakang tepi akan tahu kitorg ckp psl pe.. It could be irritating for them sometime..
Lagi la kalau tgh bergaduh, org akan ckp I raise my voice to fight..walhalnya saya hanya la menyatakan.. and sometime ada yg label saya as RUDE..

But deep inside, xde satu pun yg betul..
Saya memang biasa berbual dengan suara yg kuat, maybe sbb suara saya besar sikit kan.. So my 50% volume is equal to others 80% volume..
Kalau sy present dlm class pun, I don't think that I need a speaker or whatsoever, I can keep them awake all the time with just using my original voice.. Tuh kalau sy jerit memang dari hujung padang bola ke hujung akan boleh dengar saya..

and I keep it +ve always.. that I talk out loud so that people will get my information clear, so that in future later no one will misunderstand nor misuse any of my words.. Tapi that's it, people do misunderstand me..

huh...

I choose to stay, dengan izinMu ya Allah.. =)

Bila kita melebihkan cinta pada yg lain selain yg maha Esa, dekat situ da hilang la keberkatan dariNya..

Siapalah saya kan.. Saya hanya manusia biasa..
Xde apa yg nak dibanggakan pun..
Tapi siapalah kita sesama manusia nak judge memasing kan.. =)

Saya sayang awk.. Apa yg sy pernah janji, apa yg sy pernah ckp kat awk, sedikit pun sy x pernah tipu..
Saya buat apa je asalkan awak happy, walaupun happy itu akhirnya nnt bukan untuk saya..
Dan saya sesekali pun xkan let go, melainkan awk yg da xnak saya..
Memang nmpk mcm bodoh kan..
Tapi biarlah saya nmpk bodoh di mata semua org, saya memang bodoh tapi at least saya tahu mcm mana nk mencintai seseorang dengan ikhlas.. (after years, I do still hold on into these..Life's full of shit that anybody forgot how to love sincerely..)
Cinta itu kan x semestinya memiliki..
So selama mana masa yg saya ada, saya akan cuba bahagiakan awak..
Dan kalau satu hari nnt awak da xnk saya, sekurang2nya da xde apa yg sy sesalkan sbb saya dah bagi yg terbaik untuk awk..

 Saya cuma ada awk dan akan ade awk selagi ade hayat saya, insyaAllah..Selagi saya mampu jaga hubungan neh, saya akan jaga, yang lain saya serahkan pada Allah..

Dan saya redha atas semuanya, apa yg dah tertulis utk saya..
Semoga saya sentiasa dapat memperbaiki diri sendiri untuk Allah.. =)

SayasayangawakAF...

Happy 25th Birthday AF!

You're 25th this year!!

Alhamdulillah so much.. =)

Semoga awk dipanjangkan umur, dimurahkan rezeki & berbahagia selalu.. Ucapan yg klise kan? Hahahahah..So ini ucapan yg non klise nyer..

Saya doakan awk berjaya di dunia akhirat, jadi orang yg lebih baik dari semalam & semoga awk dapat apa yg awk cari dlm hidup ini..Saya sayang awk selalu..

Saya minta maaf sebab kek abis cair.. Hurmmm.. I wanted you to have the best cake but it turn out to be a disaster kan.. Anyway, I do have a great time & good pictures on ur big day tuh.. Hope awk pun rasa yg sama kan.. Hihi..

Last but not least, xde sehari pun yg saya x bersyukur atas kehadiran awk dlm hidup saya.. Thank you Allah that he was born that day & he's still here with me.. Alhamdulillah...

P/S: Iloveyou!

Rules For Life

Saya sakit... =(

I don't know how to say this..

Da pernah buat check up pun, sonogram, ECG, Stress Test..

All is okay..

Tapi sakit neh datang juga..

Bila saya kata saya sakit..

Sakit dia bukan macam sakit perut masuk angin yg letak minyak angin je then nnt da lega..

Saya sakit, sakit sangat..

Saya sakit smpi kdg2 susah nak breathing, sampai kadang2 x sedar air mata da kua..

Perit...

But, sometime it hurts more when you tell a person that you're in pain and they just thought it's nothing..

So I just keep it to myself..

First game saya okay lagi..

Second game, dia datang kejap2..

After third game tuh, I can feel the pain every time I breath..

And last game, I'm numb..

I hardly can't feel the air I breathe..

I can't do nothing.. Tapi percaya lah yg saya bagi yg terbaik dah..

I'm sorry that on the day, my best is only at 50%..

Now dah hari ke4 rest baru numbness neh rasa kurang..

Hurrrmmm, I don't know a single thing bout this painful thing..

Tapi saya takut to face it in future again..

Banyak saya fikir, sampaikan saya fikir utk quit futsal..

Yeah, maybe I have reached my limit kan..

Tapi...... I just hope I can know what, why & where this pain come from..

Alhamdulillah all went well so far for now.. =)

Owh, my Boo pula yang x sehat right now..

Sabar ye Boo, I will always pray for you..

Sesungguhnya sakit itu kan menghapuskan dosa2 kecil..

Terima kasih Allah & semoga semuanya akan okay balik.. =)

Hope..

Dua hari lepas ada dua orang budak kecil datang kedai..

Saja ringankan mulut tanya2, kata nak menjual kan..

Tapi dorg segan2 je nak ckp..

Semalam dorg datang lagi, kali neh da kurang segan..

Tanya pasal baju semua..

Tapi yg paling kecik tuh kata baju semua besar sgt, dia x muat..

Mmg pun, kita cuma jual all adult size..

So request la dekat dia bawa baju sendiri..

Tadi pg dorg dtg lagi, masih berdua..

Tengok2 je..masa nak balik yg tinggi sikit tuh ckp la nnt ayah dia dpt gaji dia dtg buat..

2-3 jam lepas tuh dorg dtg lg..

Kali neh da x segan pun, siap tanya mcm2..

Da bgtaw kos plg murah dlm 10 ringgit..

Then masa nak balik tuh dengar la yg tinggi tuh ckp mcm neh

'Nanti kalau abg ada 10 ringgit kita pergi buat ok..'

Oooo, adk beradik rupanya..

Tersenyum sendiri sy..

And I learned something there & remember something too..

=)

We can always learn even from small kids..

Check up done!

Hari tuh pergi check up dekat ISN, jantung ada problem..
Then rujuk pakar dekat hospital serdang..
Dia check jantung and buat stress treadmill test..
Macam2 la yg org tuh bgtaw, sy pun x faham apa2..

Injap bocor sikit..

Dinding jantung belah kiri kembang sikit..

Pulse lambat naik and cepat turun balik lak..

Kene refer ENT laa..

I really have no idea of what's happening.. Is it good? or bad?
Tapi doctor cakap there is nothing to worry..
Nanti jumpa doctor kat ISN balik lak..
Whatever it is, I just hope that all will be fine.. =)

and there is something, a very different feeling masa buat check up tadi..
Buat sonogram dekat jantung.. I grab the opportunity, tengok jantung saya berdegup kat monitor..
Can't really explain the feeling.. saya nampak jantung saya berdenyut laju macam mana..
I'm touched.. =)

Nothing more but thank you Allah for the life you have given to me.. I will sure take a very good care of myself..

Alhamdulillah alhamduillah, alhamdulillah..

17 most important things to remember in life

1.       Never give up on anybody. Miracles happen everyday.

2.       Be brave! Even if you’re not, pretend to be. No one can tell the difference.

3.       Think big thoughts, relish small pleasures.

4.       Learn to listen, opportunity sometimes knocks very softly.

5.       Never deprive someone hopes, it might be all they have.

6.       Strive for excellence not perfection.

7.       Don’t waste time grieving over past mistakes. Learn from them & move on.

8.       When someone hugs you, let them be the first to let go.
9.       Never cut what can be untied.

10.   Don’t expect life to be fair.
11.   Remember: Success comes to the one that acts first.

12.   Never waste an opportunity to tell someone you love them.

13.   Remember that nobody makes it alone. Have a grateful heart & be quick to acknowledge those who help you.

14.   Never underestimate the power of a kind word or deed.

15.   Laugh a lot. A good sense of humour cures almost all of life’s ills.

16.   Don’t miss the magic of the moment by focusing on whats to come.

17.   Watch for big problems. They disguise big oppurtunities.

Me + make-up

Tadi balik je tiba2 terjumpa eye liner..

Yep, of course that's mine..

I even have full set of make up okay, the basic one la kan..

Tapi syg, sebab I rarely use them..

So tadi poyo2 sikit la, conteng2 muka then berangan bajet retis.. hihi..

Just a bit of touch up I can turn myself into a China doll, a pretty one taw..

But it is just not me.. =)

If other girls feel confident wearing make up to go out, it goes different way for me..

I dun feel good.. x selesa.. macam ada roti canai melekat kat muka.. =P

and I will sure be in a lot of mess, trust me.. hihi..

But in future insyaAllah boleh adapt kan..

maybe pakai simple2 if ada occasion aje.. =)

I'm good this way, I feel beautiful enuf.. hik hik hik..

Tadi lak tergedik2 hantar pic kat my Certain Someone, saja je nak tengok if dia perasan any difference of me with just the eyeliner & lip balm..

Berbunga-bunga hati saya baca respond dia..

Thank you sebab terima saya seadanya..

and thank you Allah for this happiness.. =)

Be grateful enuf with life & what's inside of it..

59 tryout to write about you.. =)

Tersenyum saya masa nak tulis entri neh.. =)

My certain someone..

How should I start this?

Of coz dari Dia yang maha Kaya, yg bagi kami rasa neh.. =)

It is exactly like what they have always mention..

"Fall in love accidentally"

I never have taught I can love someone this much..

Tapi betullah Dia maha Kaya..

Bila saya rasa mustahil untuk ada rasa suka dengan ikhlas, Dia beri saya rasa tuh..

The best part is, Dia beri juga rasa yg sama to my certain someone tuh.. =)

I do always wanted to write bout my certain someone, tp there's too much words, too much feeling till I don't know how to start.. and I usually ended up with smiling alone to my lappy.. hihi..

Hidup neh kadang2 agak pahit.. Tapi sebab my certain someone, I found out the bitter is so sweet.. =P

Thank you Allah for everything, for sending him to me..

Thank you, thank you, thank you..

I'm happy with what I have now..

Hello September!

Whoaahhh, time flies so fast..
Rasa macam baru minggu lepas puasa, baru semalam beraya..
Now da in the middle of league pun..
Kedai pun da officially open.. =)

Nowadays antibody dah x kuat, asyik sakit je.. =(
Few times of breaking down but I still manage to smile..
I do almost lose myself but I get back, everything is in control..

I will keep on smiling.. =)

Thank you Allah..

My Favourite Shoe.. =(

Susahnya la nak cari mood utk blogging neh..

Baru je mood sampai, nak post entri pasal raya tapi dapat lak khabar angin buruk..

Kasut hilang!!!

Berpasang-pasang kot yang hilang..

Bergenang air mata bila tahu kasut kesayangan pun hilang sekali..

Ya Allah...

Kasut tuh xdelah harga sampai berpuluh ribu..

Tapi kalau nak diukur dengan wang ringgit, mmg x ternilai la kan..

Sebab kasut tuh dari someone very special..

Da la kitorg memang pilih colour favourite saya.. Hurmm..

Saya neh jenis memang x beli barang utk diri sendiri..

Da berapa lama saya x pernah ada kasut jogging..

Harap apa yg ada je..

Dia belikan utk saya, terus saya pakai kasut tuh je sepanjang masa..

Jogging ke, naik bukit or even pakai untuk travel..

Semua org tahu itu kasut saya..

So korg pun tahu betapa saya sayang & hargai kasut tuh sangat2 kan.. =(

Tadi ada org masuk rumah kot, hampir kosong rak kasut dibuatnya..

Speechless so much..

Macam mana saya nak bagitaw dia ye?

Paling sedih, macam mana la hati saya ye..

Down da neh..

Saya redha laa.. ~sigh..

Da la, xde mood..

Bye...

Travel with it, Bangkok! =(

Di pertengahan Ramadhan...

Ada banyak request untuk beraya sekali neh..
Yelah, x dinafikan setelah hampir sedekad lebih di perantauan, saya berpeluang utk kenal ramai org..
Dorg baik hati sangat utk kesah pasal saya..
To my Family angkat semua, yang kat Kedah, kat Johor, kat Terengganu & Shah Alam.. Terima kasih sebab ada untuk saya, mengaku saya neh sebahagian dari ahli keluarga..

Tapi untuk kali neh saya minta maaf sebab saya xkan balik beraya mana2..
Kali neh saya nak beraya dengan my own family, walaupun dorg x sambut raya tapi I just wanna celebrate with them..It has been a long time.. =)

Banyak sangat pengalaman Raya saya yg x dpt & xkan saya lupakan..
Terima kasih sangat2 & andai ada salah silap saya minta maaf dari awal hingga akhir, dari hujung rambut hingga hujung kaki.. =)

Sekian, Selamat berbuka semua.......

Fasting Month!

Rasanya masih belum terlambat nak wish Selamat Berpuasa to all Muslims around the world kan?

I feel so much different this time, rasa lebih bermakna kot.. =)

Alhamdulillah kita jumpa lagi wahai Ramadhan..

Walaupun saya terpaksa training dalam bulan puasa, tapi itu semua x jadi masalah kan..

In fact, dia ajar pasal sabar so much.. Yelah, pagi pergi training, balik sambung pergi kerja, petang buka puasa then training balik.. It is so tiring.. Tapi Alhamdulillah all went well..

To take it positive enuf, harap tahap kesabaran saya akan semakin meningkat.. hihi.. Lagipun, training itu kan da mcm sumber rezeki saya juga.. da kira macam beribadah gak.. bukannya sia2, puas hati sangat bila mampu settlekan dua2 sekali.. =)

Dan satu lagi nikmat berpuasa ialah solat.. =) I have not much words to describe the feeling..but I do hope u guys feel the same too, betapa indahnya Ramadhan kan..

Last but not least, semoga kita semua bergembira di bulan yg mulia ini..

Salam sayang dari saya, chewahhhh!

NotaKaki: Me & my roommate in national camp!

My Thunder Thighs

I used to be ashamed of my thigh..

It looks too big & ugly..

But day by day I learn to love myself..

My thigh is now one of my fav body parts, for it I have ran 21km and won the championship!

Proud enuf of it & legging is never my enemy anymore..

LoveYourselfEnough!!

Lari...............

Lari..
Korang pernah lari x? Atau mencuba untuk lari?
Lari kejap dari dunia yang xkan pernah berhenti tunggu kita walau sesaat..
Kenapa perlu lari?
Saya pilih untuk lari sebab.. Sebab saya tahu xde siapa yang akan boleh faham situasi saya..
Sebab saya tahu xde siapa akan kesah.. Sebab saya xnak org nmpk betapa lemahnya saya..

Coz I do sometimes broke over a silly matter.. Maybe bcoz you held so much kan then it come to a breaking point where even when it is just ur pencil patah pun da boleh buat u down giler..

I used to run, ever since when I'm a kid..
I ran to my friends house.. I thought that being in their world would help to erase my pain for a while..
Bila da besar and staying in new environment, I thought that I'll stop running.. But life is not that easy..
Saya lari lagi..Tapi kali neh saya lari to where no one can find me.. I found a place, empty one.. So I spend my time there for hours.. to recall it back, it is actually a Muslim small prayer room..

And nowadays, the new me.. I do still run.. But it is different this time..
I run back to home.. =) I wept all the way & by the time I reached home, it all seems gone..
Seing the faces of ur family, knowing that they are still there for you, knowing that you are not alone, it is actually the best feeling..and that feeling do actually helps me to erase all my pain..

and here I am, HOME! =)

Thank you Allah for the people that you have send to me..

Salam Ramadhan Al-Mubarak!

My Butt is BIG!

Credit to Nike for the awesome quotes!
Yes, my butt is Big and I just love it that way..
=P

The Arts of Lost Words

My second trial for FB coverpage TL..
I think I like it..
=)

Happy JULY all!!!!!!!!

I just love being Me so much!

I learned to accept what I am & I love being me.. Every inch, every part of what makes me today, and who I am NOW!  =)

Alhamdulillah...

P/s: Credit to Nike for the image..